When you hear the word “Black Woman” what do you think of? Maybe strong, magical, smart, nurturer, etc. Growing up in a black family household, you never really spoke about your business. The quote I usually heard was ” what happens in this house stays in this house”. That quote stayed with me even today in my adulthood. As an adult now, I understand that my aunts and grandmothers really meant well when they said those words. They didn’t want people sticking their noses in something it has no business being in. Or because just maybe they didn’t want to be judged. I was raised if you have an obstacle face it head on, find a solution and get through it simple as that. But what if you can’t just face those problems by yourself. Usually my family would tell me to pray about it. Sometimes situations need prayer and action behind it. I do believe God send us individuals in your life to help you through each situation.
Many black women try so hard to keep up this “image” of superwoman . We try to handle any and everything that life throws at us. But when life becomes hard who can you talk to about the rough patches. After my son was born, I fell into depression. Many would say it was postpartum but I felt like it was it was different. Here I was with a new child that has a this condition that I really didn’t know anything about. Plus, I was living with my aunt with no job. I felt really down and got really hard on myself. I was doing everything on my own and I my mind was running 100 miles a minute. To add on being depressed I had anxiety. I was thinking that I was being a burden/taking up space in my aunt’s house. I didn’t want to tell my friends/family because I felt like I would be seen as crazy or even be judged.
For me to to keep my spirits up, here are of couple of exercises I did to mange my anxiety. Now I am NO doctor. I can only tell you what worked for me. For one I had to take time for myself. I mean really sit and turn my phone on do not disturb and breathe. I learned how to mediate get the loud sounds away from me to clear my head. I had to learn to try not to be not too hard on myself. Count to ten understand everyone is not perfect, & we are all trying to get through this thing called LIFE. Finally I talk to a counselor. When I was growing up, if you heard someone was talking to a “shrink” you just thought they were crazy. Now me being an adult, talking to someone who knows NOTHING about me help me be more open with expressing myself.
Again I am no doctor, this is what helped for me. Anxiety still rears it’s ugly head somedays, it’s all about not letting it take hold of your life. I think the best thing I was able to do was go to counseling. Getting everything out in the open is a great thing. Its natural for us black women to feel weak. It is okay for us to say “hey I need help, I cant do this by myself”. Its okay sometimes to step back from a situation and say “I need a break for a minute”.
Comment below and tell me if you have anxiety, what do you do to handle it.